Working with teenagers for over 30 years, I see that adolescents are often at one or the other end of a spectrum. They can be passionate, motivated, loving and lots of fun to be around. However they can also be angry, depressed, shutdown and all too tragically, even suicidal.
Below is a chart from RMIT showing Subjective Wellbeing of Australians between 12 and 55. Of note is the enormous drop in wellbeing that occurs between age 12 and 16 which is also when we see an increase in diagnosis of mental health issues, risk- taking behaviour and more. My work involves looking at what we can do to avoid this slump and this has led me to the study of Rites of Passage.
For thousands of generations, indigenous tribes and communities around the world have recognised the critical importance of creating a process to support the coming of age of their boys and girls.
As they are going through the transition to become young men and women, enormous effort is put into elaborate Rites of Passage (ROP) in order to ensure that the process occurs in a manner that best serves both the boy or girl and his or her community.
Traditional ROP were often dramatic and could even be life-threatening, so many people might disregard these processes in a modern context. But at a time when we don’t have formal ROP let’s compare tradition with what we see our youth doing in contemporary life.
In Africa boys had to hunt and kill a lion or other wild animal with a spear; in Vanuatu they jumped head-first off high towers made of bamboo with a vine tied around their ankle that barely stopped them from hitting the ground. Apache Indian girls had a puberty ceremony where they stayed up all night singing and dancing in a trance-like state. Boys of the Algonquin Indian Tribe of Quebec were given a powerful hallucinogenic drug. In several African tribes girls had lip plugs inserted which were progressively increased up to 15cm in diameter. In New Zealand and Tahiti boys and girls received tribal tattoos on their faces and bodies.
The length of time dedicated to a ROP could be weeks or months, even longer. In Papua New Guinea, some boys spent up to three years away from their mothers!
Now, with no formal ROP young men seek dangerous risks like driving their cars perilously fast, getting into fights, surfing on top of trains or base jumping. Young women go to rave parties and trance dances, get drunk or take drugs and stay up all night. The availability and unsupervised use of illegal drugs is now part of their culture. Increasing numbers are getting piercings and tattooing themselves all over their bodies. Sadly many young men and women shut down from their parents and push them away for years.
Most tragic can be the consequences of teenagers trying to create their own unfacilitated ROP. Deaths and injuries from risk-taking behaviour are increasing and the actual level of risk is increasing as our young people look for bigger and bigger adrenaline rushes. Drug addiction and overdose are constant dangers and with the introduction of cheap designer drugs the incidences of psychotic episodes are greater than ever.
Creating safe passage
The words ‘Rites de Passage’ were first used by the 19th-century French anthropologist Arnold van Gennep who found that all traditional societies had, ‘A ritual way of creating a passageway to pass from one stage in life to the next’.
van Gennep found that no matter where in the world they occurred, ROP all had the same three basic phases. These continue to be an important part of modern ROP processes, and are easily adaptable to school settings.
1) The separation
The first stage of the ROP was when the boys or girls were taken away by the male or female elders and separated from the rest of the community. They would not return until the ROP completion.
2) The transition
The main part of the ROP always involved the following in some form or other:
The history, values, beliefs and knowledge of the community or tribe would be passed on to the boys or girls through storytelling, songs and dances.
A challenge that involved facing mortality whilst overcoming fears and difficulties was created, and importantly facilitated by the elders.
The elders would recognise and acknowledge the young man or woman’s individual gifts; their spirit.
3) The return
The final stage was when the young men and women returned and the whole community would gather to witness and celebrate.
There were two key intentions or outcomes to a coming of age ROP. The first was a shift from thinking and acting in child psychology. In this state the boy or girl is the centre of the universe and acts with little regard for others or the future. They are selfish, controlled by their emotions and take no responsibility for the consequences of their actions. Boys are looking for a mother and girls to be treated like a princess. This is normal in a young child but highly inappropriate in an adult man or woman.
Traditional societies recognised there needed to be a shift to healthy adult psychology where the person would know they were a member of a community and that their thoughts and actions had to consider others as well as the future. Traditional societies knew that a society run by people functioning on child psychology would not be sustainable.
The second key part of a traditional coming of age ROP involved the public recognition and naming of the individual gifts and talents, or spirit, of each child as they are becoming a young adult. This is based on the belief that there are roles that need to be filled within any community and each role has a person who is best suited, or even fated, to fill it. The task of the elders was to help each young man and woman find their role. All roles needed to be filled and each person had a role to take.
Finding their role
While traditional societies had a spiritual approach to defining a person’s role in society, from a purely western or even medical approach this is still just as relevant. Every person has natural gifts and talents. Every person has things they love doing and in children it is often most evident. Some will love building, others singing or dancing, there will be children who take things apart to see how they work or are always off exploring or pushing the boundaries. The key is to support our youth to find what they are passionate about, or as Joseph Campbell said ‘to follow their bliss’. When a person is doing what they love and are best at, then they will be most motivated, best able to learn and most fulfilled. We need builders, singers, dancers, engineers and explorers. It’s all about finding the right people to do the jobs to which they are best suited.
A large percentage of people spend so much of their lives working at jobs they dislike or remaining in situations they know aren’t good for them. Often they have done so due to pressure from parents, peers or a society that says that money and possessions are the ultimate goal.
Many boys and girls feel enormous pressure to conform and are sacrificing their individuality as well as that which they are most passionate about. Meanwhile we have an epidemic of depression and mental health issues among adolescents that is largely treated with pharmaceutical drugs. This sickness of the soul cannot be overcome by medication when the underlying issue is a failure to connect with their true spirit and passion.
School-based Rites of Passage
Increasingly it is being recognised that we need to be recreating community-based coming of age Rites of Passage and schools are the perfect place to do so. Students have regular times for camps for example, and it is very possible to develop a programme somewhere between Year 8 and 10 that utilises the elements of a Rite of Passage.
Students sharing their own stories as well as hearing from elders who may be parents or teachers is deep and powerful.
Challenges can be created and examples include spending time solo in the bush, going on a long hike or even learning to ski.
Finally, an opportunity to be honoured by peers and elders who name the gifts and talents they see in the boy or girl is a process that has incredible impact on the self-esteem of the individual and can be a life-changing event.
The greatest physical, emotional and spiritual changes a male or female will ever go through occur at the time of puberty. It is a time when they most need support, mentoring and guidance from their elders, and teachers are perfectly placed to lead the way.