Three Questions You Should Ask Over A Cup Of Coffee
Back in the early 1990’s, whilst working in the United Kingdom, I was involved with a product called the Personal Communication Computer (or the P.C.C. for short).
It consisted of a desktop computer with a camera, tailored hardware and software and a phone connected to an ISDN line. Each P.C.C. would connect with another, allowing the participants to see and talk to each other in a small, realtime video window, whilst annotating a whiteboard as they spoke. The P.C.C. evolved into what we know today as Skype.
At the time I asked my boss, John, if I could work out of our training office, which was only 10 kms from my home, as opposed to my daily commute of 35 kms into London to our headquarters. I argued that we could use the P.C.C. and make it a collaboration tool to help me deliver my work remotely. He declined my request. I asked again, only to receive the same answer.
When I pushed him, John replied, “Elias, I need you in the office, because all of the business is either conducted over a cup of coffee or around the water cooler!”
What he was telling me is that leadership is all about relationships. Technology is great, but you have to learn how to supplement technology with relational skills.
The last two years pushed us down a technology rabbit hole. The use of Zoom, Teams and Google Hangouts has changed the way that we have been interacting with our students. This has been forced out of a necessity, borne for our own safety as we battled to understand the devastating effects of a virus that was wreaking havoc globally.
I recently spoke to the Deputy Head of a Junior School whilst attending a birthday party. As we sat out on the deck, enjoying the salt air and hearing the waves crash at Milford Beach only a few metres away, I asked her, “How did you cope with the use of technology, especially amongst the new entrants?”
What she described to me took my breath away. Teachers in her school were forced to adapt to the new technology. In addition to the students that they had to engage and educate, their parents were also looking in on each session, mounting the pressure on already stressed teachers.
As I reflected back to John’s comments, I reminded her that we should not rely on technology to engage by itself, but we should take the time to invest in our key staff through more traditional methods.
Here are three questions that you should consider asking the next time you have your One-on-One over a coffee to help you build relationships with your key teaching staff:
1. “How are you doing?” If possible, make these a coffee catch up and keep them social. After all, John insisted that business is conducted over a cup of coffee, so why not indulge in your favourite almond, oat or soy latte to make the experience more decadent?
2. “Is there anything that you want to talk about?” Sometimes people just need assurance that it’s okay to bring up tough subjects or topics that go a little deeper. This can help the conversation move from superficial subjects to something a little more meaningful if the other person wants. If they aren’t interested in talking
about anything, don’t pry. Instead, let them know you’re willing to listen if they ever do want to talk.
3. “What can we do to help?” Offer them access to appropriate counselling. Mental health issues have dramatically increased recently. According to a report published by the Canterbury District Health Board, “Most people know someone who experiences mental distress (77 percent).” Create a safe haven for your staff to open up to you over that cup of coffee.
And if you’re going to invest in that oat latte, you might as well splurge and pick up a slice of carrot cake at the same time. It would be criminal not to!