Holding Yourself Accountable as a Model
“The standard you walk past is the standard you accept.”
As I walked out of a school staffroom recently, I was reminded of the above quote and it hit me between the eyes like a blunt instrument. It reminded me of how guilty I am on occasions of the perils of lowering my standards to increase my average by avoiding conflict, dodging the hard conversation, challenging the lazy student, reflecting honestly with a struggling teacher, etc. There are competing forces at play as to why I might behave like this, but it bothers me, nonetheless. I dare say we are all guilty of this one way or the other. It’s just that, on this occasion, it bothered me a little more.
Over the last few months I have moved between many schools working with staff to support the establishment of improved policies and procedures that with an ‘one in, all in,’ collaborative approach, see significant improvement in teaching and learning. This will be hard work for the leaders, teachers, students and broader community because, and I am not speaking out of turn here, some of these schools face some significant social challenges. It was one that we are all too familiar with that caught my attention. However, I sensed a genuine willingness to roll the sleeves up and get to work.
The origin of the metaphorically induced blunt trauma inflicted upon me as I left the school staffroom, dawned on me. Those damn mobile phones and the horrible impact they are having on how our kids communicate. The COVID-19 pandemic has not helped with increased screen time as a result of online learning, but guess what? We adults also need to shoulder or, probably more appropriately, take the responsibility for this worrying behaviour right on the chin. In schools, both locally and abroad, the use of mobile phones has become a monstrous issue, coupled with bullying and mental health issues that are parked right beside each other.
A generation of young people who are seeking instant gratification, and whose parents and key adults in their lives have modelled, the very behaviour that is crippling the communication skills of these young people. Something has to shift. Mobile phones have their place in a plastic tub at the front of the classroom, in the kitchen before bedtime, in school bags, in pockets, dare I say not even with you, as you disconnect, look up, rest your fingers and become more present in your day-to-day activities.
Am I guilty of this behaviour? You bet I am! But I have made a commitment to be more present at home and at work as I endeavour to model the behaviour that will foster deeper connections with the people that I care about. Spark up that conversation that once upon a time naturally flowed around kitchen tables, school yards, on trains, in cars. This is a case where silence is not golden at all. Us adults need to step up to the plate here because we dropped the ball on this one. Who’s the boss? You are the boss! Step up by setting clear guidelines on how and when phones are used. Don’t accept the standard. Set the standard.
