From Trauma to Triumph

Teaching Effective Problem Solving and Decision Making

Making good decisions and solving problems are the keys to having meaningful lives. When we are triumphant in our decision making, we are more content in our lives. With all the options and choices that we have available in today’s world, you’d think we’d be the happiest people ever. In fact all the options and choices we have can be traumatising as we anguish and despair over which path to take, or not. This impacts children and adults alike. A child quickly picks up on the trauma an adult is feeling and suffers from it in some way, usually replicating the same behaviours in their adult life. This is why it’s paramount that we both learn and teach the importance of making good decisions and choices.

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Journey

Over my 30 plus years of involvement in education, theatre and business, I became increasingly interested in what ‘it’ is that results in some people having meaningful lives while others fall short of the mark. It was the same observing the many classes I taught.

“The children who were content didn’t all come from the same background or similar levels of ability. So what did they have in common?”

It was the same with colleagues. Some teachers were stressed or unsatisfied despite working hard, having great ideas and thinking about their work-home balance. It was also the same with me and how I felt about how I lived my life. In 2015, I was fortunate enough to be awarded a sabbatical and also won a scholarship to attend the NESLI advanced leadership programme. This, along with the experience I had writing National Educational Resources as part of a contract in 2017, all contributed to what I have discovered.

Discovery

When what we know, what we feel and what we do all align, we put ourselves into a position to effectively solve problems and have more meaningful lives. This is a very simplistic overview of something far more complicated. As a result I have created a unique model that assists both children and adults to work through a simple process. This model is multi-layered and I present the foundation of it in this article.

The model is based on this:

When we are unsure, overwhelmed and feeling burdened by decisions, we can feel like we experience trauma amongst the chaos. When we are sorted and have a ‘way’ of solving problems and making decisions, we become triumphant within the fast paced, ever-changing demands of today’s world.

So what is this model?

It involves what I call the ‘3 Core Drivers’ for decision making and problem solving. When these 3 drivers are what I like to call ‘aligned,’ we are on the way to triumphing over our problems! So, what are these drivers? The Three Drivers are:

Your Information Driver: Your knowledge, skills and thinking

Your Energy Driver: Your instincts, feelings, desires, motivation

Your Tangible Driver: Your sayings and your doings, your visible actions

Chaos

When you are operating from just one driver, or when all three drivers are going in different directions, you are in the state that I call ‘Chaos.’ You are not going anywhere and you don’t feel great. This state can be traumatising. When you are operating from your Information and Energy drivers, you are in the state that I call ‘Inaction.’ You have the knowledge, you feel good about it, but you are not doing anything. Think of that academically able student in your class that talks a lot about their good ideas, has the knowledge, but does not apply it in class.

Directionless Action

When you are operating from your Energy and Tangible drivers, you are in the state of ‘Directionless Action.’ You are doing what you feel without a plan, purpose or progress. I get like this whenever there is a change and I don’t know how to deal with it.

Personal Unfulfillment

When you are operating from your Tangible and Information Drivers, you are doing what you think is best but you don’t feel great about it. You are in the state that I like to call ‘Personal Unfulfillment.’ My brother wanted to be a teacher. He was academically very able but he was advised that he would be ‘wasted’ as a teacher. He went through the motions of a different career path and had great results, but he was not enjoying it at all. He changed directions.

Triumph!

When you are operating from all 3 Drivers, you are in a state that I like to call ‘Triumph.’

An elderly lady who lives in our neighbourhood pushes a pram with pamphlets in it delivering them into mailboxes. She knows she needs to be fit to stay healthy. She feels really good when she interacts with the neighbours out walking and she enjoys earning a bit of extra cash. All her drivers are aligned and it is a pleasure to be in her company.

I was in a school recently where ‘we don’t do that here’ is embedded in any behaviour that does not bring joy. The benchmark for behaviour is high. One student told me, “When you are learning, your brain is getting stronger and I really want a strong brain.” What this school had embedded in its Energy Driver was reflected strongly in the Information and Tangible Drivers.

Let’s all become triumphant in our decision making!

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Monica Williams


Monica is the owner and creator of the Delissimon blog, a baking and photography blog that started in 2008. She is a wife, mother to 3 children, baker, photographer, lover of chocolate and partial to a good wine. Based in the Bay of Plenty she is passionate about good food, happy children and all the fresh air you can get!