Having prepared her class for the unit on “Sustainable Futures,” eighth grade social studies teacher, Mikaela Riley, projected a chart on the white board showing that the size of the Earth’s population would about double by 2050, mainly as a result of population growth in India and China (en.wikipedia. org/wiki/World_population). On the other hand, the amount of food production is steadily decreasing due to clime change. Mrs. Riley posed a question to the class to initiate discussion: “What might be done to solve the problems related to food production and the earth’s population growth?” The following discussion ensued:* (Adapted from Swartz et al)
Carlos ……….“I don’t know”
Mrs. Riley ….“Well, let’s use our critical and creative thinking as well as drawing on past knowledge. It will become a serious problem in your lifetime. We may not have enough food, water and space to sustain such a large and growing population. How might we solve this problem?”
Michael …….“We could send some people somewhere where they won’t need food and space”
Mrs. Riley ….“Where might that be?”
Michael ……..“Into space.”
Mrs. Riley …..“Why there?”
Michael ……..“They won’t need to eat our food or live here anymore.”
Jessica……….. (Giggles) “That’s stupid. Of course they’ll need food in space.”
Matt …………“I think that wars will keep the population in check.”
Jessica………..“That’s a dumb answer too. Wars don’t solve problems.”
Marissa ……..“Some people think so. That’s why we have so many wars. Look at what is happening in the Middle East.’
Jasper ………..“My uncle was wounded in Afghanistan”
Mrs. Riley …..“Let’s hold on a moment! I can see that we’re not listening to each other. Let’s stop this conversation and learn how to listen to each other with more understanding and respect”.
It is obvious to Mrs. Riley that in order for this group of students to conduct classroom dialogues well, understanding what listening respectfully means and some skills of respectful listening must be mastered. Of course this will take practice and Mrs. Riley, along with other staff members, will need to offer many opportunities in their lessons for students to practice, apply, monitor and assess their own growth in these listening skills. This article is intended to describe what constitutes skillful listening and how teachers can cultivate this disposition in students today and as they become efficacious citizens in their future globalised community.
Eight Dimensions of Internalisation
It is easy to think of listening respectfully as a disposition that students either use or don’t use; that they have or don’t have. It would be more accurate, in describing the acquisition of this and other dispositions by asking the following questions:
1. Awareness: Do the students have a conceptual understanding of the meaning of the disposition—what does “listening respectfully” mean? Can they articulate what it looks like, sounds like and feels like? Can they give some examples and
non-examples? Can they use synonyms for the label and cite instances when they used or should have used the disposition? Can they recognise when it is happening?
2. Skills and Strategies: How skillfully do the students execute the disposition with confidence, grace, and style? Do they have a range of strategies, tools, and tactics to carry out the listening respectfully??
3. Situational alertness: Is the disposition being used appropriately and consistently across many diverse situations? Are students alert to situational cues that signal when to employ and when not to employ respectful listening?
4. Autonomy: Is the disposition being used autonomously—without prompting or being reminded by others? Does the motivation and inclination to listening respectfully emanate from within— without seeking reward, recognition or approval from others?
5. Benefits and values: Does the student realise the benefits and values of choosing to use the respectful listening? Do they predict the consequences of choosing when to use or when not to use the disposition?
6. Self-monitoring: Do the students reflect on their skillfulness in using the disposition? Are they becoming being of their own listening skills and making a commitment to constantly improve the performance and apply the disposition in an ever-widening set of circumstances? (This capacity is known as self-directed neuroplasticity (Rock & Schwartz). Do they advocate for the use of respectful listening when they see that other individuals and groups need it?
7. Mindfulness: Is respectful listening used consciously, proactively and intentionally? Dispositions are not habits that are on “autopilot.” Being alert to situational cues, do students consciously realise that this is a time and place when, for example, he/ she needs to listen respectfully?
8. Moving to Action: Thomas Edison once said, “Vision without execution is hallucination.” Do students have the will and motivation to move to action on the disposition? While students may display the first seven of these dimensions, the disposition must be thoughtfully acted on, carried out, and fulfilled. Additionally,
students should be prepared to call for the use of the disposition for others. So in a group situation, for example, the students are willing to call on the need for respectful listening. This is probably the most challenging of all the dimensions.
Teaching the Capabilities of Respectful Listening
Students need more than just the name of the disposition. Mrs. Riley starts this process first with some direct instruction
in skillful listening. “Over the next few days and in future discussions, I want us to practice three steps that can improve our listening skills. You will remember them by the three ‘P’s’ of listening: Pausing, Paraphrasing and Probing” (Costa and Kallick). She also tells them that she will use the term “Listening respectfully” to describe this way to engage in listening to others. She explains “respectfully ” as a disposition that puts the listener in the place of the speaker as if the listener had the speaker’s point of view and feelings. This, she says, will enhance the understanding the listener has of the speaker’s ideas. The teacher then writes these focal points on a chart which she posts on the wall.
Listening Respectfully
1. Pause: give the person you are listening to a chance to think about and finish what he or she is saying.
2. Paraphrase: Summarize what the person is saying in your own words.
3. Probe: Inquire into the person’s meaning by asking clarifying questions.
Mrs. Riley will want the students to practice these skills as they discuss further the population issues as well as other topics. In fact she will want to help them internalise this disposition. Obviously, more than just this introductory experience is needed. Mrs. Riley says: “Let’s start with the first ‘P—Pausing’. For the listener, there are three meanings to pausing.
Pausing your lips— during conversations, there will be only one pair of lips moving at any one time.
Pausing also means using “wait time” before responding to a person’s answer or asking another question. Do not respond impulsively. Rather we give your speaker time to consider options, alternatives and other possibilities before they give an answer. We want the speaker to compose their best, most thoughtful answer rather and giving an impulsive, off the top of the head answer (Rowe).
Pausing also means ‘pausing your brain’. It’s like pushing the pause button on your Blue Ray. We set aside our thoughts that may be off the topic or that are about some personal experiences that you may want to share but won’t necessarily contribute to the discussion” (Derber).
Mrs. Riley then says: “Let’s practice pausing. I’d like you to form into pairs. I want each of you to read the second paragraph on page 45 in your social studies book about the projection of population trends in the US and the world. When one partner has finished, look up and tell your partner in your own words what that paragraph means to you.
Before any of you say anything, however, I want you to pause and count backwards from 3: (3-2-1). Let’s try it.”
The students practice and, after a while, the teacher invites reflection:
Mrs. Riley ….“How was that for you, when you had to pause?” What did you tell yourself?
Marissa …….. “That was hard—not to say anything. I had a lot of ideas but I couldn’t say them.”
Jasper ……….. “ I t seemed weird. That’s not the way we talk at home.”
Carlos ……….. “ I had to listen. While I had some ideas, Danielle had some different ideas. It was neat.”
Mrs. Riley ….“So what did you have to do inside your head to remain silent?”
Marissa………“I had to tell myself not to say anything. I wanted to talk but couldn’t while Maria was talking”
Jessica………..“Counting backwards helped me remember to be quiet.”
Michael……..“ Matt forgot to pause and he interrupted me. Can we try that again?”
The teacher also works with the students to elaborate the next step in skillful listening. “The second ‘P’ is Paraphrasing,” she says. “Paraphrasing lets others know that you are listening, that you understand their ideas, that you are trying to understand them, and that you care about and respect their ideas. Paraphrasing implies that you want to understand another person before you give your ideas. It means summarising or putting another person’s idea into your own words. Here’s an example. I’m going to ask Carlos to share his idea about controlling population. Now pay attention to what I say when Carlos is finished talking. Carlos, say your idea again.” (Mrs. Riley demonstrates.)
Carlos………..“I think we should pass a law limiting the number of children people can have. They do that in some other countries.”
Mrs. Riley “ So Carlos’s suggestion is to control the population through legislation. Making it against the law to have more than a certain number of children.”
Mrs. Riley “What did you hear me do with Carlos’s idea?”
Jessica……….. “You said it in your own words but you still used his idea.”
Mrs. Riley ….. “Yes, exactly. Now I want you to try it. Again, let’s get into pairs and read the next paragraph you page 45. “I want you to try it now. Let’s listen to and paraphrase each other. And let’s be aware of what we do inside head to remind ourselves to paraphrase“(Washburn)
Mrs.Riley…..“How was that for you, when you had to listen to and paraphrase your partner’s idea?”
Matt …………. “That was hard—Michael went on and on and I didn’t get to share my idea.”
Jasper ………..“It seemed weird, too. That’s not the way we talk at home either.”
Marissa………“That was neat. Listening before prejudging someone’s contribution makes sense. Being silent helps. I was surprised at the great ideas and how much Ellie added.”
Mrs. Riley …..“So what did you have to do inside your head to paraphrase your partner’s ideas?”
Matt ………….“Michael talked a long time and I couldn’t remember all he said. I had to remember his main idea. Making a list inside my head of his main ideas helped.
Mrs. Riley ….“So what is the value of listening respectfully?”
Jessica………..“If you don’t listen to others’ ideas and problems you could miss a great idea or a giant problem that you had been unaware of before.”
Mrs. Riley …..“Tonight at home, I’d like you to practice your paraphrasing with your parents or brothers or sisters. Let’s also remember when we practice, to use what we learned yesterday about pausing.”
Jasper ………..“They’ll think I’m weird”
The elaboration continues. “The third ‘P’ in our good listening skills is probing. This is appropriate when your partner says something or uses some words that you don’t fully understand. It lets your partner know that you respect their idea and that you are seeking deeper meaning and understanding so you clarify their terms. It is very respectful because it honours their thoughts and you want to understand them better. Let me give you an example. Carlos, let’s go back and reconstruct our conversation from yesterday. I’m going to demonstrate probing with Carlos and the rest of you observe what I say.” The teacher models:
Carlos ……….. “I think we should pass a law limiting the number of children people can have. They do that in some other countries.”
Mrs. Riley ….. “So Carlos’s suggestion is to control the population through legislation. Making it against the law to have more than a certain number of children. So how many children should be the limit?”
Mrs. Riley ….. “What did you hear me do with Carlos’s suggestion?”
Tamika ……… “You summarised then you asked him to be more specific.”
Mrs.Riley…..“Yes. Now, let me demonstrate some more. Carlos, when you said ‘other countries’, which other countries do you know of from your reading that limits the number of children that people can have?” “Again, what did you hear me do with Carlos’s idea?”
Tamika ……… “You made him be more specific. He had to give some exact names of countries; he couldn’t just say ‘some countries’.”
Carlos ……….. “I had to make it clear to you what I meant and then you could understand me better.
Mrs. Riley ….. “Yes, exactly. Now I want you to try it. Again, let’s get into pairs and read the next paragraph on page 45. Let’s also remember be aware of what’s going on inside your brain. What do you say, to yourself to remind yourself of what you are practicing and why we are doing this? I want you to use what we learned yesterday and the day before about pausing and paraphrasing.”
The students then practice pausing, paraphrasing and probing as they continue discussing the problems of the population growth. Towards the end of the period, Mrs. Riley asks the students to anticipate and project in what other classes, careers, jobs or situations it would be important to listen respectfully?
Carlos………..“My uncle designs web pages. I listened to him and learned. I still get suggestions and I’m making my website even better.”
Michael ……..“When I got my I-pad I had to really listen to my sister who knew how to download songs and apps and videos onto it. It didn’t make sense at first and I was really confused but I kept probing her until I understood how to do it.”
Matt ………….“When my mom gets mad at me for doing something she doesn’t like, I wish she’d listen to my side so I’d know she really understands what’s bugging me.”
Marissa………“In my dad’s job, he has to listen all the time. He’s a personnel manager and almost every night he tells about some problem he’s having between his employees and how he has to listen to the complaints and suggestions from each of them.”
Elie ……………“I have to listen to my soccer coach. He’s always saying to the team, ‘Listen up, listen up!’ I thought I was listening and now I know how to make my brain really listen.”
Jasper……….. “I think I’ll try this at home.”
Besides the 8 dimensions listed above, another and more critical factor for learning to listen respectfully (or any other learning for that matter) must be included. Imitation and emulation are the most basic forms of learning. Teachers, therefore, realise the importance of their own display of these desirable dispositions in the presence of their students. Thus, in day-to-day events when problems arise in schools and classrooms, students must see the significant adults employing the same types of behaviours. Without this consistency there is likely to be a credibility gap. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” Skillful, respectful listening starts with us.